So I have something a bit more on the wild side I’d like to discuss with you all. Have any of you ever heard of human pet phone sex? Well let me tell you it's sort of having a sex slave, except there's not so much sex! You see, human pets don't deserve sex. They're like little filthy mutts who deserve to be on all fours 24 hours of the day seven days a week! You walk them around on a leash just like a real pet and you make them drink and eat out of pet bowls. And if…
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